**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize