You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
