omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
No more Irish car bombs ever.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
