she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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