I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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