if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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