you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
