Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
you made out with another girl for some wings
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
