Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
