put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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