Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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