There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
You're breaking my sexual little heart
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
