The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
