i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
