Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
