plz talk dirty to me
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I am mentally ready for anal.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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