i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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