we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
