awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
