look no pants
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
