He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
