Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
