My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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