Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
