Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
