i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
