Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
