To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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