well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
50% drunk capacity currently
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
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