it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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