I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Sober January is a disaster.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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