It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
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