There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
