you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
