I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
