We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
