Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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