I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
