Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
