apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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