he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
how do flat chested girls get laid?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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