Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
