Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
did you just send me my own nude
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
