TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
