So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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