Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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