No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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