you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
