Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
