First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'm at about main and main street
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
